Faced with increasing scrutiny from media and politicians, some Muslim leaders are turning to a new 24-hour hotline for “Sheikhs shaken by bad press”. The hotline, run out of a call centre in Bangalore, India, provides counselling to clerics who find their private ministrations made public.
“We had one imam call up after he made […]

While door knock appeals are typically recognised as charity drives undertaken by the Salvation Army, there is the lesser-known, but actually more popular, Muslim version. If you’re a single Muslim woman, it’s likely you’re receiving these visits from interested suitors, or if you’re very lucky, his mum and sister.
Satirical Muslim offers […]

US President George Bush is rumoured to be on the lookout for a new villain, the President slash aspiring casting director told reporters yesterday.
“This new guy in Iran is one of the favourites – great CV. Word around the water cooler is that he’s the next Bin Laden,” the President said with a wink.
Bush admitted […]

In an effort to heal his and others’ heart wounds and reassure Jews that he’s not a bigot, Mel Gibson is set to direct a blockbuster film on Muslims after Apocalytpo hits screens, according to Hollywood bible Variety magazine.
“I’ve covered Jews with Passion, the Scottish with Braveheart, the Mayans with Apocalypto, and now […]

Buoyed by the success of its recent production of the Saddam Hussain execution, the Iraqi government has finally found an industry to augment natural resources as a principal export of the war-torn Iranian protectorate.
“We want to set ourselves up as a centre for torture and executions,” said an Iraqi interior ministry spokesperson. “If Beiruit […]

Controversy struck an Egyptian secondary school last week after a student was suspended for allegedly lying to his teacher.
According to reports in the Egyptian media, Ibrahim Batatas had failed to hand in his end of year assignment on time and had then offered his teacher the excuse that a dog had eaten his homework.
The boy’s […]

Local councils have angered Christians throughout the United Kingdom by declaring that public celebrations of Christmas are “hate crimes” against Muslims, Jews and other religious minorities.
“Although we don’t know of any Muslims within our community, we think one reason why they are not making themselves known is because all these open and shameless […]

Parents at a Reading school have reacted angrily to reports that halal meat would be served to Christian children at the school.The parents have accused the school of attempting to promote Islam by stealth and of selling inhumanely slaughtered meat.
“Halal meat is very inhumane,” warned one parent. “We are used to our animals being gently […]

Hollywood super couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have announced they intend to adopt a child from India confirming widely held suspicions that they are attempting to win a world record for child collecting.”Some people donate stamps or butterflies, but we collect orphans. We have a special temperature-controlled complex at home where we […]